Cheerleaders

It’s weekend again, and the weather in Texas is still dismal. Last month was apparently the coldest January on record. The hotel is full of young girls with names like Britney and Kassandra – apparently  the national championships of the NCA (National Cheerleaders Association) are being held in the Dallas Convention Center. Girls are chasing each other through the corridors, the floor is covered with popcorn, and it’s impossible to find a table at breakfast, even if you didn’t mind sitting amidst the noise. Strangely, they’re mostly chaperoned by seriously obese mothers bulging out of the same t-shirts that their daughters are wearing – living vicariously, I suppose.

But I’ve never been to either the Dallas Convention Center or a cheerleading competition, so I thought I’d check it out. My interest was short-lived – it was $5 to park, and $20 to go in. I’m curious, but not that curious. The trip wasn’t wasted, however, as I found a wonderful sculpture of an old-time cattle drive that I hadn’t seen before.

Crossing the river ...

... and watching the herd

 While in Dallas, I stopped at the Farmers’ Market and bought some tangerines. On the way out, I picked up a medium horchata, to quench my thirst, from a Mexican snack stand.

For a while, I’ve wanted to see Crazy Heart, the movie for which Jeff Bridges has been nominated for an Oscar. The matinee performance was only $5. Excellent value – a great movie, with great music, and some memorable lyrics: “Funny how falling feels like flying … for a little while”. If you liked The Wrestler, you’d like this. But I have to tell you that old people in the movie theater are worse than teenagers. I had to bite my tongue to stop myself asking them to shut up.

Lunch was Chow Mein and Orange Chicken, washed down with Dr Pepper, from the Panda Express, and then back to the hotel to listen to A Prairie Home Companion. If I don’t get out on a good road trip soon, I’ll go stir crazy …

Snow

It’s been an odd week, weather-wise. Yesterday it was reported that 49 of the 50 United States had snow on the ground (I’m sure you can guess the odd one out). And Dallas had 12 inches of snow, which is unprecedented. The pictures are from the 6^th floor window of American Airlines headquarters, on a day when almost 20% of their flights were cancelled due to the weather.

 

So I’m limited to the local area for the weekend, and my thoughts turn to food. I’ve read recently that a new product – “Taste No. 5” – is about to be introduced to Waitrose supermarkets in the UK. It’s apparently been around in Japan for 100 years, and is only now poised to stun British taste buds. When I googled it, I found myself at an online Daily Mail page, with Taste No. 5 advertized on one side of the page, and K-Y Jelly on the other. Now, there’s two products you wouldn’t want to get mixed up …

While confined to my hotel room, I watched what is euphemistically called a cooking program on PBS. They were making roasted tomato salsa, which sounds quite appetizing. “We’ll start with two cans of roasted tomatoes”. Hmmm … if you’re going to do that, why not just start with two cans of roasted tomato salsa? Never mind – they ultimately blended their way to the finished article. And what did they do with it? They added it to “Mac and Cheese”! Now it seems to me that that adding good food to crap is like multiplying by zero – you always finish up with zero.

America is astonishingly oblivious to anything that is happening around them, and in their arrogance (appearing to the world, as Guy Forsyth says, like a “spoiled drunk 15-year-old waving a gun in their face”) are destined to go the same way as the Roman Empire (I’m not the first to make this observation – Michael Moore, in “Capitalism” captured the analogy convincingly in the first few minutes).

If you’re planning to visit the US to “find America”, I think you may already be too late.